Bold Blogging

Hey All!! :)

Recently i have been struggling with many different things when it comes to who i am and what i stand for. And let me tell you it hasnt been easy at all. For those of you who know me you will already know these things but for visitiors i am just going to try and give you an overview of who i am/try to be.

I am a 16 year old who is way above her age. It is easier for me to converse with Adults over my peers. I am super Catholic, and really love it! I try to do everything and anything i possibly can--but this most likely leads me to super anxiety. I am one of those people who totally sweats the small things and wear my heart on my sleeve. I beat myself up over every mistake i make. I am a people pleaser and i strongly dislike when people are mad at me or dont like me. I have come to terms with the fact that i can be a perfectionist--I AM ONE! haha. I definatley have many flaws and things that i need to work on.

Wow..looking at that list makes me shudder a little bit haha :)
Throughout my life i have been critizcised for what i look like, what i do, and just plainly how i am. When i was younger i used to think that i was the super wierd kid that no one would ever like, just based off of the things said to me. I used to hide behind a mask, not wanting to let people see who i truly am, because in their eyes i wasnt "normal".

Since my Sophomore year things changed. AMAZING people have walked into my life, and friendships have been made stronger. Things got difficult yes, but the thing is i didnt feel i had to hide anymore. I dove deeper into friendships, relationships and my faith making me a much stronger person all in all. I realized how much i am loved and cared for, just the way i am.

I realized that I am who I am, I am who GOD made me to be and why should i change, i mean im FANTASTIC in his eyes :)

But in the past few weeks i have been feeling that mask start to slide down my face again and again. I am feeling almost ashamed of who i am and what i believe because its is definately not the "norm". When i post blogs i have been afraid of who i am going to offend, hurt or make laugh at me because of what i write on here. And after i sat in my room and prayed last night, i know that this mask that is coming back needs to be thrown in the trash ASAP!

So from now on..... I am BLOGGING BOLDLY! That means no more sugar-coating whats going on in my life, no changing so people will like me more, and most importantly i am staying true to who I am and what i believe.

Definition Of Boldly-

not hesitating or fearful in the face of actual or possible danger or rebuff; courageous and daring: a bold hero.

not hesitating to break the rules of propriety 

So right now i stand before you, from now on ready to bare all for who i am.

God Bless,
Ashley